Day 13 of 365 Days of Being
I have been wondering what's true humility. I have seen the humble brag often enough, heard the prideful boast as well. In the process of being empowered, I had a period last year when I was power tripping. It lasted a week or so. I feel a tad embarrassed writing about this. I have been disempowered for so long, being empowered was so new to me, I had to sort out the nuances of the new me. Plus I had an awakening to sort out as well. When I finish this sentence, I'm over my current triggered embarrassment, after much practice I can center myself quickly.
I'm thankful that my mentor and a loved one prompted me. I'm a keen learner, I love developing myself, learning is like having a feast and I gobble it all up like I'm starving. Nom nom nom.
Nothing I like better than a deep conversation, oh good Lord, I love it. I'm also a fast learner, they both told me once each and off I was, adjusted the next day. I helps that I trust that they have my best interests at heart so I didn't need to figure that part out. I learn so fast, some find it shocking and some find it suspect. I'm naturally interested in self-development, psychology, philosophy and enlightenment so I find great joy in it. Similiarly, I enjoy observing someone's period of transformation from fight or flight to fly, nothing moves my heart more than this.
So what does humility really mean?
True humility is being able to accept criticisms as graciously as we accept compliments. —Sabrina Newby
There will always be people who see our worth, are for us. Also those who don't and aren't for us. To expect to be loved equally by everyone is self-imposed suffering. To expect those who love us not to stand in their integrity and highlight our shadows kindly is a disservice to our growth, it's an attack on their truths as well. No real dialogue can happen when our egos lead. To be unable to stand in your own integrity and speak your truth with sincerity, that's terribly damaging to your spirit as well.
So where does humility end and empowerment start?
Let us bring peace and happiness to women everywhere by putting a stop to rape and gender violence that create humility and fear - Aung San Suu Kyi
As a feminist, I believe that humility is confused with disempowerment. Especially in Asia, I'm considered loud and really rather unacceptable, as long as I'm not a mouse sitting in the corner, I'm too much. Only soft spoken girls with zero opinions and no voice, busy looking pretty because oh no, if you ain't pretty, nothing else matters. Only long straight hair, fair skin and big eyes allowed. Geez, give me a break.
BORING. I'm not a robot, I have no want to be a robot, I fought against being a robot all my life, ain't caving in now.
I do have naturally big eyes. Mother nature scores a point for me. Go mother nature, it's your birthday!
Having a voice and presenting my truth is too much, I'm too much. Well, I am everything. It certainly can be too much for those coming from a place of fear. I am also nothing. This also can be too little for those who are ego driven. I sit right in the middle, since all is about balance, I would say I'm ahead.
The words "I am everything and nothing" have been one of my mantra's in 2017 until now. I am only here by grace, all is by grace. I am everything because only when I am overflowing, I can execute my soul mission AKA purpose well. This is same for everyone I believe, it's a matter of remembering our original worthy selves, having faith in our personal powers of healing and trust in our beings.
Humility is also used as a weapon for inequality, just like kindness can be used to gaslight someone to accept the unacceptable. You can be empowered and humbled by a heart of service. You can be loud and be humbled by the want for equality. You can be kind and say no. You can be good and have boundaries. None of it is mutually exclusive.
If you're humble, nothing will touch you. Neither grace or disgrace because you know what you are - Mother Theresa
Yes, I totally agree. You are not people's criticism, the criticism isn't you. It's not one and the same. It's possible that despite trying our best, we have some missteps, being self-punishing or punishing others serve no one. People often mistake this for me not caring, actually no, it's me seeing the larger picture and being able to let go quickly so I experience profound peace. Caring doesn't require me to be in a state of worry or distress, that is mismanagement. Only when I'm my best self, can I be my best self to others.
I often reflect if I'm on the right track, my answer from above is as long as I resonate with my old self, I'm doing fine. My personal idea of humility is seeing a teacher and student in everyone. That not one is lower or higher, equal worth. I think we're all meant to help those travelling our old routes, out of our deepest sorrows rises the greatest triumphs. This is my unshakable belief.
Love, light and peace.
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