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About

Min is a queer Singaporean Chinese lesbian digital nomad currently residing in Asia, passionate about women's liberation, healing, spirituality, cats and dark dry sarcasm.

She meditates regularly because she doesn't suffer fools well, not because she's interested in being holy, she's also an expert in it. As you will soon see, she likes to swear like a sailor, it's cathartic, she thinks.

She does yoga occasionally because naturally large breasts are a literal pain in the neck, bikes for fun and enjoys extreme sports when it strikes her fancy. 

A multi talented artist who writes, illustrates and sews, a spiritually gifted empath witch whose a not-that-kind-of Christian for 26 years, she thought she led a full life until she hit rock bottom in 2016, found out bad things come in threes isn't an old wives' tale

She dated an abusive manipulative person for a few months, was sexually assaulted by a random new doctor, fell and broke her ankle due to a freak accident.

The accumulated stress triggered 36 years of suppressed CPTSD.

Along with that is a Kundalini awakening in Japan, when she saw a vision of her Twin Flame projected from her third eye into the sky, when she asked God why, she said she is suppose to love and care for you. 

Many octo-balls of fire in Japan

She needed two major surgeries and an implant, she now beeps when she passes airport security, something that tickles her to no end. She also has a limp, that leg ain't no good now. 

The horror of spiritual warfare  

The worst year of her life was a rebirth, the start to a new life, a life she truly wanted, not one she was programmed to take on, not the life her parents, partner, peers or society wanted for her.

She set her nice girl chronic rescuer self free, she quit her internalised misogyny, healed her childhood trauma bonds, set down a huge punishing inner critic and a lifetime worth of self loathing baggage down. 

It was all based on a simple life changing promise God made to her, that she will be healed and whole, she will be free from the bondage to the world, that promise took her on the road to self actualisation and higher consciousness, led with the holiness of her spirit.

Within 1 year, she was free, rock bottom to highest self, the results exceeded her wildest imagination, an experience so profound and moving that she cannot refuse the world this magic. 

Along the way, she discovered she was chock-full of spiritual gifts, she has always been close to God, which explained her ability to get two degrees, a list of various certifications, win a wall of sports medals, starting as a competitive athlete since 7. 

The problem is like many over achievers, she did so well because she was a workaholic, she knew how to push herself beyond her limits, she also blamed herself for the inability to find lasting joy and inner peace, in 2016 she finally broke. 

There is such a thing as being too strong for too many, at some point, you get pushed off the edge of life into The Dark Night Of The Soul. 

Attending Pink Dot Singapore, standing up for lesbian visibility 

Pink Dot Volunteer 

Volunteering for Ready 4 Repeal - toppling 377A that affects gay men

She was used to having bouts of chronic depression, periods of suicide ideation since she was a teen, she survived two post male violence ( same perp) suicide attempts, each time she desperately prayed and God helped her, her first attempt was right after she accepted God into her life.

She was 14. 

When she told her therapist, she asked her, how did you do it? She also can't explain it then, other that a calmness took over her.

From a sobbing mess determined to end her life, trapped and afraid, too young to work, with nowhere to go, flustered and in an utter panic, she was totally still in a spilt second. 

Misdiagnosed with bipolar in 2007, she tried every method under the sun to find a cure, from psychiatric medication to therapy to aromatherapy to vitamins to exercise and much more, she exhausted all avenues.

Disillusioned and in despair, burdened with a deep fatigue of the soul, she was resigned to her fate, that her mental health will always be lousy, she was coping and there're many people who had it worse, it was not the end of the world, she told herself.

She had purpose and she always went after what she wanted, she soldiered on like she always did, it's not so OK but it was bearable. 

She discovered it was CPTSD in 2017, also via prompting of the spirit. It's a huge relief to know what's going on, finally everything made sense to her. 

She did a stint in fashion, worked for Big 5 global advertising firms, loved the creativity, found the superficiality intolerable, office politics insufferable, decided to leave a lucrative job with a bright future to pursue her first love - social service. 

A volunteer activist since 1994, she became a certified trainer to peer mental health counsellors along the way. By 2019, she has 25 years of activism experience, including 12 years of mental health advocacy, 4 years in violence prevention specialising in the area of abuse recovery and worked for global to mid sized social welfare organisations in various full time executive and managerial positions. 

 Treetop ziplining across 30 stations in Changmai, Thailand

Biking in Rottnest Island, Western Australia 

                                                       Biking in Singapore  

Stallion for a madam in Bali 

No, she isn't a human ninja turtle, although she sure wears loads of helmets, sheroes in a hard shell, turtle power! 

No helmet for skydiving though......one of the weird human things. 

Skydiving in Jurien Bay, Western Australia

Blackilocks is her baby, a creation born out of yet another revelation that also came to her in early  2016, when her then partner asked her, "if you can do anything, what would it be?", she said "write".

She gave up everything else against the massive disbelief and disapproval of all. Everyone thought she was mad to start all over again at 36, she was confident she can revamp herself, change is constant and she loves a challenge. 

She was sick of prioritising everyone, seeking their approval and always pleasing them, she wanted to try and put herself first for once. 

She lived her entire life being a nice girl, always doing the right thing, towing the line, keeping her head down, being the bigger person, avoiding trouble. 

This made her popular and well liked, she was welcomed and invited, yet there was also a lingering vague idea that something was missing. It's how hard it took for people to see her as a virtuous woman even though she was a doormat pushover, that's what led her to feminism. 

This is a website she started when she hit rock bottom in 2016, it has since been revamped in 2019, over 500 articles about abuse, family dysfunctions, social issues archived.

She is a spiritual feminist injoy, a trauma recovery specialist who shares joy, a fearless activist killjoy, who doesn't shy away from controversy.

She believes when we have enough courage to challenge ourselves with difficult conversations, enough empathy to hear two sides to every story, that's when magic happens, that's how social change happens. 

She spent 4 years researching abuse, with the objective of getting into an abuser's mindset and healing abused women like herself who have the tendency to be drawn to toxic or abusive people, enmesh and try to rescue them while being complicit in their own demise. 

The women who she sees as sheroes yet can't see their own strengths through their struggles, the women like her. 

Rock bottom in 2016

Rising - learning to sit with pain

Rising - some good days 

Rising - taking writing classes

Rising - some good days, some bad days

2019 make up free 

A masterpiece doesn't need make up, she knows she's already art

Make up is often used ironically for her, being make up free gets her more attention than an introvert like her needs, so make up isn't a mask, but an expression of artistry. 

A spiritualist first, a healer second and a feminist third, all things led by spirit is an edifying beautiful life. She experiences great satisfaction, a life filled with meaning and purpose, surrounded by people who care for her greatly, it's a holistic balanced life of blessings galore. 

Finally peaceful and joyous, her inner world is one of unmerited grace filled victories that conquered her trauma.

Something unthinkable for someone who struggled with her mental health all her life.

A miracle has happened.

The sacrifices are great, the rewards are breathtaking. 

The promises are real, the light is real. 

Eshet chayil, God is a she. 

Min 

Find me on 

Facebook - blackilockswomen, Asian Femifesto

Instagram - blackilocks, Asian Femifesto and blackilockspoetry

Pinterest - blackilocks

Twitter - Asian Femifesto

Tumblr - Asian Femifesto

Reddit -  Asian Femifesto

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YouTube - blackilocks Asian Femifesto

Admin of Handmade Singapore Facebook Group